What Was I Thinking?

Oh dear Brazil. I just spent 10 wonderful fabulous days in another country without Carl and my kiddos...what was I thinking?

I did my best to consult my mentor and former boss, Dr. Phil Jett as to what clothes to wear...what was I thinking?

I jump on my plane on Friday, sat on the runway in Tulsa for 2 hours, came back to the terminal for 2 hours and then set off once again for Houston. I land in Houston with just enough time---perhaps 40 minutes to make my connection to Sao Paulo and I get a phone call from my wardrobe consultant/personal travel agent/great friend, Lyle Larson. Uh my group (that I didn't even know in the first place) from Jackson, Mississippi was delayed at the airport in Jackson and would not make the flight. AND I would be flying solo to Sao Paulo...what was I thinking!!

Did you know that not many people speak English in Sao Paulo airport? And did you know that I only know two words in Portugese? Good morning--and thank you. Seeing as I landed at night only one of those words were working for me....what was I thinking?

Well some how (hello we all know it was the Lord), I made it onto my flight to Porta Segua where I was greeted by the wonderful missionaries for Pioneer Evangelism, Eduardo and his sweet wife Rosa.

I am always amazed--at the graciousness and thankfullness of people in other countries. They are so grateful that you would come and help them minister to those in their country. It has been 8 years since I have been on an international mission trip...what was thinking?

I finally meet the wonderful team from Crossgates Church in Brandon, Mississippi. For the record there is nothing like southern people. We take a 6 hour BUMPY ride up the mountain and reach our final destination.

Our week consisted of construction work,

washing feet of precious Brazilian children, giving reading glasses, dental clinic, playing games with these children, speaking at a conference

has the opportunity to lead 6 people to Christ--one who was a bar owner and one precious lady who had tried to commit suicide more than 4 times...what was I thinking?

I will tell you what I was thinking....I serve a God who can take an ordinary girl like me and through His power do extraordinary things! I was thinking I serve a God who is worthy to leave my husband and children for 10 days to love on people who need to know about my Saviour. I was thinking how incredibly blessed I am!!

Father's Day 2010

I dearly love Father's Day---because I dearly love the two most wonderful fathers on the face of the earth that are in my life---Jess Stenner and Carl Lopez.
I'm really at a loss for words--I am not kidding, I really am. Because I am just overwhelmed by these two men. I know they neither one are perfect--for those of you that know them---I am not kidding--they aren't. But for sure they both were the two perfect men to have in my life to make me into the woman that I am and to love me for who I am.
One of my favorite memories growing up, was to stand at our big picture window that looked into the driveway of my grandparent's house about 50 yards away and wait for my dad to pull in their driveway to drop my grandpa off (they rode to work together Everyday for almost 50 years---I am not kidding, they did.) Anyway, as soon as I would see them I would take off running down our drive way which was very long---just so I could hop in the truck and ride home with my daddy. I can't even tell you how exciting that was to run to meet him just so I could ride up the driveway with him. I loved and still do spending time with my daddy.
Last week my LITTLE sister turned 40--I am not kidding, she did. Which is totally weird considering I am only 35 myself. But she did and so I drove to KC for her birthday party. I had to turn around and come right back to Tulsa the next day because of my crazy little family and our crazy little schedule--I am not kidding, it is! But on my way out of town, I stopped at my dad's machine shop and visited with him for almost two hours. He was running some parts so in between putting the sheets of metal in to be cut by the laser, we talked ALOT about my grandpa.
This is our first Father's Day without him. Can not tell you the sadness for my family--BUT the joy of having such a godly heritage. My sweet 89 year old grandpa went to be with Jesus 6 months ago. I am so thankful for his character, his work ethic, his love for the Word of God, his desire that EVERYONE know Jesus--and that he passed that on to my daddy and daddy passed that on to his girls and to his grandkids.
SOOOOOO thankful for Father's Day and for the chance to say thank you to my daddy and to Carl----for showing us on a consistent daily basis the love of our Heavenly Father.
One of the things that has made me sad today is to think of people in my life that are spending today with out their fathers-- perhaps for the first year. My prayer for them today is that they will find comfort in knowing that we have a God who has promised to be a Father to the fatherless--I am not kidding, He has. (Psalm 68:5)
Happy Father's Day!
I do hear by solemnly swear to be more consistent with blogging---I am not kidding, I really am!!!

9 Months Behind

Well well well--it looks like it has been almost 9 months since I last entered the blogosphere. When I started my blog, one thing I wanted for sure was to be transparent--like that would ever be a problem with me. Could my lack of blogging be any more transparent of who I am--inconsistent. And as with most of my former posts, I usually try to relate; to all my 5 readers, something that God is teaching me through just EveryDay stuff. And well my inconsistency is no different.
Literally I blog for sure once a week---in my head. Why is it that it never makes it to the lap top and onto my blogspot? Why is it that I long--desire--want so badly to share my thoughts--lessons--ideas and yet do very little about it. Why is it that I feel horrible and guilty and like an L-7 loser when someone says, "I wish you would blog Denise" Okay so that is only my mother but still...I feel laden with guilt for not following through with something that I started. Why is it that I feel soooooo incredibly guilty and worthless when I fail to blog?
Well isn't that where we end up spiritually sometimes--inconsistent and left feeling guilty? Oh how I love my Southern Baptist conservative roots. And oh how thankful I am for disciplines I learned growing up in a wonderful little church in Kearney. And sad to say along with that wonderful heritage came a baggage of guilt for not measuring up to what I thought God expected of me. But at 45 years of age (are you kidding me?--I am halfway to 90) the Lord is teaching me to do less and be more--live in grace. And so well my desire, my hope, my intention is to blog more often--for sure more often than once every 9 months--but if I don't it'll be okay. Won't it?

My Baby is 7!

Today was Austin's birthday. Wow when did she get so not a toddler, she is a kid--and it makes me sad!! What a doll she is. She is for sure our carefree, want to make you laugh, tell a STORY, hug on you, love on you, not afraid of anything, little girl.

We started our day with the usual decorated door. Although her and Avery "camped" out in the living room--I still did her door--started to decorate the mantle--didn't have the same feel to it. And of course Mr. Patient, Carl helped after midnight with the task of the night.

It was not the most creative but it matched her invitation and so, well enough said!

Love having a birthday on a Saturday! We celebrated with breakfast on the patio and a candle in her breakfast burrito--which was her menu request.

Next she was off to take Abby swimming (Abby needy a little mommy's day out away from the puppies--yes for those of you who do not know--PUPPIES--AGAIN--we are irresponsible dog owners what can I say?) via a bike ride with Daddy. She looks soooo old.

We had her party at Bounce U--which for those of you who know me KNOW I do not (or rarely) do a party any where other than my home. You can do much cuter things in your backyard.

But Bounce U is where she wanted it--so Bounce U it was. I was reminded why I do my own parties when it was time for 25 kids to have pizza...and...no pizza. Give me a C...give me an O...give me a N...give me a T...give me a R...give me an O...give me a L. What's it spell---CONTROL!!! I like control. So needless to say I wasn't very happy with Bounce U. However I was very sweet and nice to our two little hostess girls...for the record.

So we opened presents, blew out candles, made our own ice cream sundaes...and THEN the pizza came! They didn't even give me a discount---and believe me I tried. So my advice to you would be just say no to Bounce U. But Austie had fun and so did her friends so that is all that counts. Right. Whatever.

So after her party we came home, got a bath, and then packed her bags to go spend the night with her best little buddy Kinsey.

What...yes it's true my baby, my last little chick in the nest, went to spend the night on her birthday with a friend. I am okay....really I am. But seriously could everyone just STOP GROWING UP!!!

So right now I am going to bed with a clean house--thanks to Bounce U--what a minute I am mad at them.

And going to bed thankful for the little gift named Austin Olivia Lopez that the Lord gave us 7 years ago today!

My Little Boy is 13!

Okay so today is AJ's birthday and he is 13! What are you kidding me? I promise he was in kindergarten the other day and could not say his r's, l's or s's. We have been over the top blessed with AJ. We are already seeing God's call on his life. Sunday night he was riding in the front seat with me driving home from church and he said, "I can't wait for Mexico." Which to be honest has been the common phrase at our house for the past month. Our youth group is going to Rosarita, Mexico near Tijuana to an orphanage during Spring Break. Yes--in case you are wondering, I do know that the State Department has issued a warning for people NOT to travel across the border. YES in case you are wondering if that concerns me--it does!

So anyway that statement was not uncommon, but taking any opportunity I can to have my kids talk to me I asked AJ, "Why do you say that bud." He said, "Because I think God's going to do great things." Okay, YES in case you are wondering I was totally proud. No describing do you hear me--none-- the feeling of your children getting it. Knowing that God is going to use them and that it will be GOD that does it.

Yes in case you are wondering I cried later that night thinking about and thanking God for that little guy!

So today in the normal Lopez fashion AJ got his birthday muffins with a candle in it.

He woke up to a decorated door this morning. I decorated his door with a golf motif--had a 3-d golf club, putting green and you guessed it 13 golf balls with a sign that said:

AJ We think you are one Tee rrific Guy.

A little cheesy--well here take a look for yourself. Hard to see the balls against the white door but they were there!

Not as creative as usual but it was nearly 1 in the morning because I stayed up chatting with my sister on Facebook--oops! Yes in case you are wondering this sadly to say has become a bit of a habit.

So tonight AJ went to RCG--youth small group in homes and had a Sandlot moment where someone tossed his football over the fence into the neighbor's yard and it got eaten by this guy--AKA--The Beast!

Yes in case you are wondering I think that is hilarious AND what a great 13th birthday memory for AJ.

Then we made our way home to find that Carl, Avery and Austin made AJ a birthday cookie. Which we quickly ate so that we could get to AMERICAN IDOL. YES in case you are wondering I already have my favorites and opinions--will blog another day about that! Loving Kris, Danny Megan and even Adam!

Life is just a little more fun with AJ!

One compliment that we get regularly about AJ from his coaches--regardless of what sport, is that AJ is very coachable. Love that he wants to learn and that he takes instruction from others--that will serve him well in life.

This is our first spring since he was in kindergarten that he has not played baseball. This was my favorite picture of AJ last year--a little happy to score! I love when a little boy moment sneaks out! They are coming further and farther between but am thankful our friend Mark caught this one on camera!

AJ is on the Jr High golf team for Union. He had his first tournament Monday. They took third--behind Broken Arrow and Jenks--was not pretty--but he looked adorable in his little golf outfit!!Yes in case you are wondering I am a proud mom! We are loving getting to see God grow this once little guy in to a young man that wants to live for Jesus Christ! Happy Birthday big guy!

Grandma Vivie

Well I certainly didn't mean for it to have been 6 weeks before I blogged again but well it is.
The day after my last post my Grandma Vivie went home to be with Jesus. We were all expecting it, she had been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer a year ago. Her four children took turns EVERY single night spending the night with her and caring for her and my grandpa for an entire year. Talk about your children rise up and call you blessed--her children rose up and blessed!!!
My little Grandma really was a walking miracle because she lived way longer than any doctor thought that she would. In fact for more than 10 days, hospice kept telling my dad and his sisters that it would be 24-48 hours. Finally on January 6th, the hospice nurse told my sweet little grandpa that he should tell her good-bye and let her know it was okay to go. So that afternoon he did. Can not imagine what that must have been like to tell the love of your life good-bye after 70 years!
I am thankful that I got to tell my grandma good-bye and to thank her for being faithful--because a thousand generations of our family will be blessed because she chose to love God and live for Him "...showing faithful love to a thousand generations of those who love Me and keep My commandments." Exodus 20:6
Although we were expecting it, and even though I thought I was ready; I was not ready to let this lady who influenced much of my life go.
My grandma was an only child. But boy did she make up for the lack of relatives when she married my grandpa--the third of four boys!!
When Grandma died, she had 4 kids, 14 grandchildren, 20 great-grandchildren and 3 great-great grandchildren. Not to mention all of their spouses. Isn't that amazing!!
I had the awesome privilege of growing up in the country right next door to my grandparents.
One of the things that amazed me most about my grandma is that each grandchild had their own special memories with grandma--that were ongoing. Her grandchildren, at the time of her death, ranged from 20-50 years old! The youngest, Andrew was one of the grandkids to speak at her funeral and he mentioned that my grandma never missed one of his birthdays. Which may not seem like a big deal but a couple of those birthdays were in Virginia and at least 7 of them were in Singapore!!
I have a ton of great memories of my grandma--we both loved antiques. The first antique I bought I called my grandma up (from a payphone mind you!!) and asked her if it was a good deal---she said yes, so I bought a pie safe. We got the famous Grandma Vivie's Hot Spice Tea recipe when were were antiquing in Greenwood, Missouri--in 1985. She served it every year at Thanksgiving and Christmas until last year. It really is delicious, but that isn't why she served it, it was a memory--that's why! I could go on and on about barbies, doublemint gum, The King is Coming, Hello Dolly, Silver Dollar City, etc etc. But the crazy thing is that every grandchild--all 14 had special memories with this lady. How on earth did she have the time??? I guess she made the time. Wow--I want to be like that. To MAKE the time for those who are special to me.
So I have been missing my grandma. The greatest thing about my grandma is that she chose to follow Jesus. She got saved as a little girl but really it was as a young adult that she began to LIVE for Him.
I am so thankful for a godly heritage from this sweet lady, an example of loving and living the Word of God and a heritage of taking time for family.

New Year's Resolutions

Hmm First let me offer my apologies for my absence in the blogosphere. To be honest I blog once a day in my head and think I need to go log in and get that down--but I do not.

Secondly, I have Facebook which is a great thing but also a time consumer. So I need to find balance between Blogspot and Facebook.

Thirdly, I had an amazing A Christmas Gathering tour. We did 5 Gatherings from November 7th to December 5th. Sooo much fun and God blessed all of those events from Nashville to Jackson to Corpus Christie to Tulsa!

Fourthly, we had puppies--8!

Fifthly (is that numerically correct?) I have four very active--cute but active children. So, well you get it.

Sixthly--hello it has been Christmas.



On to my New Year's Resolutions...

1) Blog more consistently--tee hee



Seriously, For the past several weeks the word that the Lord keeps bringing to me is PEACE. He has done this through different avenues. Of course through my quiet time--one verse in particular that has been showing up everywhere is "My peace I leave with you, My peace I give to you. Not as the world gives. Let not your heart be troubled neither let it be afraid." John 14:27

I do not know what 2009 will bring. I don't know what will happen or not happen in 2009. But I have resolved that whatever it is I will be at peace and I will get my peace from God--not the world.

Another thing that the Lord has been showing me is that my home needs to be a place of peace for my children. We run a tight ship around our house. It is a loving ship but a tight ship. But I always want our home to be a place of peace and not stress--a refuge for my children.

Another thing is that I want my life to exemplify peace. For whatever reason crazy and I mean crazy things happen to me--don't ask for them--don't go looking for them--they just happen. Um check out some previous blogs if you don't believe me. And I think it is easy to get stressed--worked up--whatever you want to call it about craziness but I want my life to show PEACE--the Peace that only comes from walking daily with a Holy God.

So that's my resolve for 2009--Peace--His Peace. Anyone care to join me?

Purity, Purpose, and Praise

Two weeks ago tonight I attended the praise service to celebrate the life of Marilyn Jett. Marilyn did not want a funeral she wanted a praise service and that is exactly what she got. Amazing tribute to an amazing woman of God.

God gave me a gift of spending a week with Marilyn one week before she passed from this life into eternity with Jesus. She could not hardly move other than to hold her Carnation Breakfast milk slushy. But we had the best time laughing and talking. I consider those four days really to be a highlight of my life. She blessed me, encouraged me and continued to pour wisdom into my life.

She was surrounded by her family, loving on her, caring for her every need and bringing her Starbucks. They definetly lived out, "her children rise up and call her blessed." So many precious moments that I will never forget.

At her praise service, Wade Akins spoke and said that Marilyn was a woman of purity--purpose--and praise. Three things that I want to be a woman of as well. Marilyn was a great example to follow. The music was unbelievable.

Sunday before lunch, Dr. Jett blessed the food and prayed for the day's events. Two things hat he said that have had a profound impact on me over the past 14 days. First when he prayed he said, "Lord today is a different day for us, but it is a good day." and then he said, "And Lord in our grief do not let us lose sight of Your Presence." An amazing man of God that not only preached the Word of God but has lived it even in the saddest day of his life.

So many things I could say about this great couple of faith. Marilyn Jett left a legacy of living for Christ--everyday and I want to live like that.

Avery Avery She's Our Girl!

Yep another birthday for the Lopez family. Today Avery is 9. She is our only little Dixie Chick--she was born at Jackson General Hospitol in Jackson Tn.


Everyone loves Avery. The comment made regularly about Avery is, "She is so funny!" And she is! She has this great sense of humor and incredible sense of timing in her humor. Witty little girl!


Wow I can't believe she is 9. So to celebrate we had a Movie Star party on Saturday night. So fun! Although boys were invited, because of ball games etc etc none showed up except our favorite little neighbor boy--Hunter!


We rolled out the red carpet...
(If the truth be known, it was red flannel 3.99 a yard at Hobby Lobby and 30% off, but hey it worked!)

Ate a little cake...



Opened presents...



And took some pics with our little party favor...

Avery woke this morning to a decorated door keeping with her movie theme. Not my best work but a decorated door none the less.


There was only Austin and I left this morning to sing Happy Birthday to Avery. Andersen and AJ both catch the bus at 7:15 so...Avery chose to sleep in rather than have a birthday choir. Nonetheless, she blew out her birthday candle on a chocolate chip muffin.


No telling what God will do with Avery--it is so much fun to see God at work in her life. WOW we are blessed!

Happy Labor Day--and I Mean Labor Day!

14 years ago today I was actually in labor! What a payoff I received for all my hard work. We were given a wonderful gift named Andersen Layne Lopez!






We got to celebrate this weekend at Beaver Lake with Mother and Daddy and my sister's and their families and Carl's mom.










And in our usual Lopez family tradition, Andersen woke up this morning to a decorated door. This is the first year we did not have a party with a theme--so what was I to do? Andersen decided to have a few friends go to The Cheesecake Factory rather than a party--I was a little sad (you all know I am all about a party with a theme!!) But I must admit that it was alot less work than you know a Survivor party or Who Done It scavenger hunt or a Luau, or a Backyard Carnival, or a Movie Star Party, or...just to name a few over the past 13 years!

I did not have a theme to decorate her door by so I simply put HAPPY BIRTHDAY ANDERSEN and then wrote on each letter an adjective describing my Happy--Amazing--Peppy--Peacemaker--Yippee--Beautiful--Interesting--Ready--Terrific--Helpful--Delightful--Athletic--Yes Maamer--All-Star--Never boring--Daring--Exciting--Relaxing--Special--Easy-going--Nice 14 year-old daughter. Of course with the help of my ever patient sleepy husband, who graciously handed my tape at midnight as I decorated her door!





And then this morning we had breakfast burritos with a candle in it to celebrate.





And then to top off her birthday, she cheered at her first 8th grade football game at Jenks High School. (PS JENKS STINKS)

Their uniforms were not in--why I don't know but she looked just as cute. There is just something about a 14 year old with braces and a big ribbon tied in a bow that I just can't get over!

Andersen has been a joy for 14 years--wow she for sure is a gift because I do not deserve a daughter as incredible as she is--just goes to show that prayer works!

God is Enough!

I had an unusual day yesterday--not in my usual unusual where something crazy happens to me, but a different kind of unusual. Because of the nature of my job, I often hear about difficulties, challenges, and even tragedies that others go through. But yesterday was a flood of difficulties to people who are close to me. With each one I shared that God is Enough! Because He is!
This last Christmas my sweet friend Melissa who designs and makes jewelry gave me a pendant with a freshwater pearl dangling from it that she stamped on that says GOD IS ENOUGH. I wear it EveryDay! I get asked often about it. People say, "Oh what does your pendant say?" So I show them and then say, "Because He is!" Melissa told me that was her theme for this year and I said me too. And I said at the beginning of the year, I do not know what will happen in 2008 or what will not happen but whatever--God is Enough!
Yesterday I got an email from a sweet friend that her husband was laid off from the SemGroup--stink. She wrote and said I am really struggling today.
My good friend Michelle is in California at a funeral of her 40 year old cousin. Almost 2 years ago Michelle's 40 year old brother died. So now these two sisters have both buried their sons in the past two years--tough to handle.
I met new friends in Nucleus Sunday night and have emailed Audrey back and forth about beginning a Spa for the Soul study for military wives because Audrey's husband leads a platoon of 78 men who will deploy for Iraq on Sept 4th. Can't imagine saying goodbye to my husband and sending him off to the front line of battle.
I got an email from a young mom at our church whose daughter has a severe peanut allergy--severe and it is keeping her family from church. It is hard to feel attacked and not be able to do anything for your children.
Got another email from my new friend Holly that her sister in law who was 8 months pregnant went to the doctor and discovered the baby was dead in the womb. Her brother is a missionary with the IMB and could not get to his wife to comfort her and be with her for more than 24 hours. So here this precious lady is in another country without her husband dealing with a tragedy no mother should bear. DIFFICULT!
My sweet parents are caring for my grandparents on a daily basis and taking turns with my dad's sisters in spending the night with them. My grandma weighs very little and continues to battle pancreatic cancer much longer than we expected. It is sad and it is very taxing on my parents and aunts.
Then I talked to Susan. Her mother is my dear friend Marilyn who is battling cancer of the unknown source and is really going down. These precious people are like family to me and it is very difficult to take. I was walking through TJ Maxx--imagine that--talking to Susan and telling her that God is Enough. I told her I am praying that for her, her brothers and her dad who is my mentor in the ministry.
So I know that this is heavier than my normal you won't believe what crazy thing happened to me post, but sometimes life is a little heavier than we want it to be. To each different person who I encountered yesterday I tried to say God is enough! He is. Regardless of how difficult the situation. Life is sometimes heavier than we want it to be and I want you to know that when it is---GOD IS ENOUGH!!

Party Crasher!

I just want to say this up front. This is a first for even me. We finished Clean Slate (which I will blog about in a day or two--unbelievable God weekend!!!!) and Carl took off for OKC to see his brother before he left for Qua tar on Sunday. So I went to pick up Andersen and AJ from a birthday party.

I asked Andersen for the address so that I could GPS it. It didn't come up but the address was simple enough so I thought I could find it. I am on the street looking for the house number and am going in the right direction. The numbers are getting smaller and I am almost there when I see a house with multiple cars parked in the driveway and street, balloons on the mailbox and a sign that says The Party is Here in the front yard. So of course I think oh here it is.

Avery, Austin and I get out of the car, ring the door bell and we are greeted by a teenage girl. She said, "hi there." I say, "Hey!" She says, "come on in, they are in the back." So we go through the house (did I mention this was about a 6, 000 square foot house I am traipsing through?) and get to the back door and open it to a backyard and pool full of about 30-40 adults. I am thinking oh this is a family party as well as a friend party. I immediately see a lady from church that I know and in my mind I am thinking, hmm I didn't know she knew the Mulders--small world, so anyway I say, "Hey!" and she says, "Well, hello what are you doing here?" So I said, "Well I am looking for Andersen and AJ have you seen them?" Because I am thinking the kids are up stairs or something. She said, "No I haven't."

At this point I am thinking, hmmm this is a little odd. So I said, "Is this 6002?" The lady seated next to her said, "No, this is 5980!" I am at the wrong house and I run into someone I know!!!!!!! I said, "Oh my goodness, that is crazy." And then the lady from church says, "Well do you want to hear something crazier than that, this is my ex mother-in-law's house!" Yes at this point I am thinking your craziness just trumped mine! So I excuse my self and get out of the house. We are leaving and Avery said, "Well the girl said, 'Come on in!'" True Avery true!

So we get in the car and drive two houses up to the house where my children really are.

Then yesterday at church Sandy told me that after I left her ex-mother-in-law said, "Did anybody lock the front door!"

Carl Lopez, the Love of my Life!

Tomorrow is our 15 year anniversary! I can not believe that I have been married to Carl for 15 years.

I thought I would briefly hmm hmm tell you all our story for those of you who do not know how we met and then married.

I transferred to Southwest Baptist University in the fall of 86, yes I did mean 1986! I had spent two years at a State University, in a sorority (please...) pursuing a major only to be told I had a lisp (by a high school student and I didn't even know I had one!) and who would hire me to be a news reporter/anchor with a lisp, and was thinking surely there is more to life than this. I sat out of school for a year and became the 7th and 8th grade Sunday School teacher at my home church--fell in love with ministry and doing what God had made me to do!



I am standing in line at SBU to get my schedule and in front of me is a really tall dark haired good looking guy--David Starnes. You all thought I was going to say Carl didn't you! My maiden name was Stenner so I found myself in line quite often with Dave.



About 3 days later he shows up at my door, looking for my room mate. They were both MK's (missionary kids) from Korea and had grown up together. So Dave and I became good friends. At some point Dave had met this really cool, really smart, really great guy named Carl Lopez. One day I was at Dave's apartment and Carl came over on his bike wearing a burgundy pullover hoodie (Edmond graduate) and I thought what a sweet guy--he is really cute too! So I fixed him up with my roommate (not the MK from Korea!)



Carl and I became great friends over the course of his freshman year and my junior year...(yes I am older) and then he transferred to OBU (Oklahoma Baptist University) shame on him!



LONG story and I mean 7 years long. Carl and I remained great friends, the best of friends really and kept in touch. Somewhere along the line I knew he was the one--by somewhere I mean about 2 months after I fixed him up with my room mate. I then waited through at least 2 other girlfriends (that I know about!).



I graduated from SBU and went to Arizona as a US-2 missionary through the then Home Mission Board. We of course wrote letters (how retro) and kept in touch. It really helped that my parents had a lakehouse at Beaver Lake in Arkansas which was 25 minutes from Carl's parent's house in Rogers. Carl's parents moved to Arkansas from Oklahoma after he graduated from high school.



Carl had two more years at OBU and then went to graduate school--in Physics (is Carl weird or what?--I mean smart or what). I finished my two years in Arizona and then went to Jackson Tennessee to serve at the incredible Englewood Baptist Church as youth and college minister--oh excuse me, my title was Director of Youth and College Ministries--it was 1990.

So, needless to say I did not date...when I say didn't date I mean didn't date ANYONE for 5 years, despite my teenagers wanting to fix me up with people like Micheal W. Smith and Carmen--true. I told them I didn't think either where good ideas because Micheal was already married with 4 kids at the time and well Carmen...not so much. Literally every conference, camp etc that I took my youth group to, my kids were always trying to find a single youth minister or youth worker to introduce me to. Let's focus on JESUS kids not Denise's date life!



Again, Carl and I remained best friends. I knew he was the one--didn't know when he would be the one but that he was. In the back of my mind, which crept to the front of my single mind quite often, I would think, what if he calls one day and asks me to be the best man (I mean woman) at his wedding..and this was before My Best Friend's Wedding (I was so ahead of my time!) And then I would end up in Africa as a missionary with my hair in a bun wearing ugly skirts--it was the 90's.


There were plenty of times that I wanted to say, "Hey what is the deal with us." But the Lord would not allow me to and had given me a verse in Song of Solomon (easy there trigger!) "Do not stir up love until it is ready." Actually it is in there twice in 2:7 and again in 3:5. The Lord knew I needed to see it more than once, you know to be for sure and all! In the Message that verse is paraphrased, "Don't excite love, don't stir it up, until the time is ripe—and you're ready." I feel extremely blessed and thankful for what ever holy restraint that it took for me NOT to take the initiative to ask Carl but waited and waited and waited...(hee hee) for Carl to pursue me (finally) rather than me pursue him. And until the time was ripe and I was ready!


Well LONG story even longer! Carl and I were very involved in working youth camps, Super Summer etc and were given opportunities to see each other.


Around April, 1992 I went to a Conference at Southwest Baptist Theological Seminary with my friends Jeff and Malea who were students there at the time. Carl came down from OSU (he is now in graduate school in Electrical Engineering--is he ever going to get out of school?) I could tell that he was acting a little different than our normal friendship. We went to church to hear our friend Randy Miller preach at this little store front church--we were going through the drive through at Grandy's and "I Will Be Here" by Stephen Curtis Chapman came on and there was a silence in our car (except for the song...come on follow me here) and I knew (okay I thought really really strongly) that we would be WE for the rest of our lives. So if we have a song I guess that would be it...or All For Love by Color Me Bad--not sure which.

ANYWAY, Carl and I went with Englewood to Brazil to build a church in May. On the plane ride home we had THE talk--yes Carl brought it up not me. Our first kiss was on an airplane 30,000 feet in the air somewhere over the Atlantic ocean. So basically we decided to get married before we ever had our first date. Our first date was at the Spaghetti Factory in BrickTown in OKC.


So there you have it folks. Oh yea the proposal...well LONG story short. Sometime around October Carl and I drove up to Pigeon Forge and back to Jackson in one day! It was sometime after we had bungee jumped! I said, "When are we going to set a date? I feel like I need to let Dr. Jett (my pastor) know when I am leaving so that the church can make plans to find a replacement for me). Taking into account that most churches get a two week notice before most youth ministers...I mean Director of Youth Ministries leave. But it sure sounded like a good way to get Carl to nail down a date. Carl said, "I don't want to set a date until we are engaged." SO I said, "Well when are we going to get engaged." He said, "When I can afford to buy you a ring." So I vowed to myself to never bring up the subject again!

Over Christmas break Carl went with me to take my youth group skiing in Boone, North Carolina (yes there are mountains er a mountain there). We had to come home a day early because it was unusually warm and the snow was melted. We came home on New Year's Day. Unbeknown st to me, it was Carl's plan to propose on January 1st, you know start the year off right and all. So we got back to church and like any good youth minister...er I mean Director of..you get it...I waited for all the parents to show up. My Carl went to take our friend Karl to get a car off their lot--Golden Circle Ford. My Carl went on to Kroger's to put his plan into place. He went to purchase flowers and a plastic thingy out of a candy machine that you put a toy ring in. His plan WAS to give me the "toy ring" say, I don't have the money to purchase the ring I want yet but I know you want to set a date so here...until I can. And then wala it would be my ring.

Blame it on nerves, but Carl locked the keys in the car with the ring in his bag. Uh-oh. Back at Englewood, all the parents are gone and now Karl, Denise, (yes that is her name) and I are waiting for Carl. No Carl...a red sporty car comes pulling up with a lady in it and Carl in the passenger seat...what!

LONG story...after attempting to get a key, Carl's bronco not starting because although there is no snow in North Carolina, it is a cold spell in Jackson and it is like 2 below out, and Carl's bronco got left in neutral (call it nerves I don't know) while he was trying to start it and it rolled into the middle of the parking lot in my apartment complex, and attempting to use the jimmy kit from Golden Circle Ford and breaking my driver side door, we finally called Al's Big Tow--that is what it was called--hilarious!

Anyway, on January 2nd at about 1 am Carl Lopez asked me to marry him and guess what...I said YES! There you have it!

Clean Slate Land

As you may know, our Women's Ministry at The Church at BattleCreek is involved in a missions..I am searching for the right word here. A missions...project..no..event..sort of...opportunity..yea kind of...life-changing unbelievable transformation of homes and lives...YES! I guess that is what you would call it. You can read about our first home here. When we did Dee's Clean Slate, her girls were in Kentucky with their dad. Well Sunday they came home!!

They came home to a new house, a new room, and a new mom. Well really same mom but a mom with a Clean Slate! WOW! Dee kept it a secret all summer from the girls. They had no idea what was in store for them when they walked in the front door. It was really a priceless moment.

So once again my sweet talented unbelievably tireless friend Ashley took pictures of the girls. Take a look here for yourself. Thanks Ashley, you never cease to amaze me. Also thanks Cindy and Carol for helping to welcome these adorable girls home!

I am loving Clean Slate. God has given us Ruby for our next Clean Slate which is this weekend. Ruby is amazing and so is her entire family! I feel so honored that God has allowed me to meet this family. This is what has blown my mind for the past two or three days. I sense and can see at times that God is doing far more than we know. He has set the stage for this incredible moment for this family when I believe pieces to their puzzle are all coming together and it is going to be some picture when it is done!! You are never going to believe all that God is doing. Nearly EveryDay I cry about what God is giving us and doing for us. Needless to say I have been living in Clean Slate Land according to my incredibly handsome, sweet, and patient husband!

Support our Troops!

I am proud to be an American where at least I know I am free...

and I won't forget the men who died

who gave their life for me

and I'll gladly stand up next to you and defend her still today

cause their ain't no doubt I love this Land

God bless the USA!

Two Saturday nights ago Carl, Andersen, AJ and I went to eat at Zios---love Zios!!! The little girls had already gone to my parent's and so it was just the four of us. There was a pretty long wait.

While we were waiting on our table--beeper in hand, a girl asked me if I could take their picture. I said, "Sure, I would be glad to." There were four girls who looked college age and they were all dressed up. (Adorable I might I add!) So I said, "What is the occasion, what are you all celebrating?" Allison, (yes we are now on first name basis!) said, "We are celebrating our anniversaries." I looked around no husbands... she continued on, "Our husbands are in Iraq and we are here celebrating our anniversaries together." Their husbands serve in the National Guard, in the 45th infantry division out of OKC. I almost bawled! I of course told them how precious I thought they were. (And you know I do not use that word lightly!!!) While we were standing there waiting, tears really did come to my eyes and of course Andersen and AJ are going, "Moooomm" I said, "I can't help it you guys, that is a BIG DEAL for your husband to be gone--at war! And I am proud of them for not staying home and pouting but for going out and celebrating their marriages!!"

Our buzzer went off. So of course our conversation continued to center around these four adorable girls and the sacrifices THEY are making as well as their husbands. By the end of our meal we all four agreed that we needed to pay for their dinner as a little anniversary gift and as a thank you to their husbands for serving our country so that we continue to have the freedoms that we do. So Carl went over and gave them money for their dinner and told them to tell their husbands thank you for all that they do to keep our country safe and free. And of course the freedom that I am most thankful for--you know--is to worship The Most High God! That I can meet Sunday after Sunday at my great church and sing praises to Jesus is something that I need to be thankful to our men and women in uniform for!

Allison was sweet enough to send me their picture and a sweet email expressing their gratitude for dinner. Which Carl and I both felt that was the least that we could do for all their husbands do for our country. I have printed out their picture and have hung it on our fridge so that we will remember to pray for these girls and their husbands and for all our troops!

So join me and when you see a man in military uniform or are made aware of a family left here--do something--thank them--shake their hand--clap for them--buy them dinner--something! For sure pray for them!

From left to right--Heaven (how about that name!), Stephanie, Brandy and Allison.

My Baby is Six!

If you are like me--bless your heart if you are, there are certain phrases that you have told yourself that you would not say.

It seems like just yesterday... is one of those phrases.

But it is true.

It seems like just yesterday, we were laying in bed and I had the flu for a really long time and Carl said to me, "maybe your pregnant." I replied, "I am NOT pregnant!" He said, "Well you might be." I said, "I am not...oh go to Walgreen's!" So at 11:00 o'clock at night my sweet Carl got up put his clothes on and went to Walgreen's to get a pregnancy test." Immediately my flu was cured and I was pregnant!!

Our conversation went something like this for the next 3-5 minutes.

Me: What are we going to do?

Carl: We are going to have a baby?

Me: Oh my word, what are we going to do?

Carl: We are going to have a baby?

It seems like just yesterday that we were having a 20 week ultra-sound with all 5 of us packed into the closet they call the imaging room--looking at this sweet little gray baby. It was in the middle of the day so Carl took Andersen and AJ back to school and took Avery with him and I was left in the room to hear our devastating news that something was wrong--they weren't quite sure what it was--could be nothing---or--I asked my doctor to tell me what she was thinking. She said, "Denise this could be nothing, we aren't sure. I have never seen anything like this and I want to send you to a specialist, a high-risk OB and let him take a look at the baby. Again, it could be nothing.." I said, "Or..." She replied, "Or the worst case scenario is that the baby's lungs will not develop and it will die outside the womb." More than I wanted to hear.

It seems like just yesterday the Lord gave me, "You are my rock, my redeemer, my strong tower, a very present help in time of need." to hang on to.

I said, "Can I get in tomorrow?" It was Thursday and I did not want to wait the whole weekend and wonder what was going on. She said, "Denise, I am a physician and I don't think I could get myself in tomorrow." I said, "Well, I am just going to pray that I do." She said, "You can pray, but I don't think you can get in tomorrow." She called about an hour later and said, "You have an appointment at 8 o'clock in the morning. I guess it worked." IT sure did and IT has worked for me for the past 43 1/2 years regardless of what my situation was.



It seems like just yesterday we learned that Austin had Cystic Ademnotoid Malformation of the Lungs.


It seems like just yesterday we were told that her case did not appear to be fatal, but we were looking at surgery perhaps days after she was born.


It seems like just yesterday that she was born perfectly healthy and perfectly beautiful. Praise the Lord! (We were not digital 6 years ago so take my word she was BEAUTIFUL!!)


It seems like just yesterday that her and AJ were sharing a room and AJ decided he preferred the couch to baby noises.


It seems like just yesterday she was making us all laugh--oh wait that was yesterday!!

Austin Olivia Lopez is the joy of our family! She loves to make us all laugh.

As in the Lopez family tradition her door was decorated for her when she woke up this morning. We are having a movie party with her friends next week so of course I had to stick with the theme!

And as in the Lopez fashion. We had a candle in our breakfast. Normally this is chocolate chip muffin, but Curt, Carl's brother spent the night last night. (He and his wife Elizabeth are here for a month visiting. They live in Qua tar and IT is amazing!) So Curt wanted Breakfast Burritos--our name is not Lopez for nothing! So Austie had her candle in a breakfast burrito--homemade I might add.






She got a bike for her birthday. As of two weeks ago, she is training wheel free and goes 90 to nothing. I have never seen anything like it. If I could I would think about entering her in BMX racing. (And by saying if I could, I mean my gracious upbringing would not allow it--so not that we couldn't really but we wouldn't. Call me pretentious but we don't do BMX.) But she is fast enough none the less. Please notice the pink skirt.! (0:







Well it is true it seems like just yesterday... we were blessed with our bundle of joy named Austin Olivia Lopez. What a gift!!!

4 Kids Is Alot!

Every summer for the past 4 years Andersen and AJ have attended New Life Ranch. An incredible week of camp for them to focus on God and have fun! They love it! During the week Avery and Austin go to stay with my parents for a few days. They love it! Soooo, Carl and I are HOME ALONE!! We love it!

The truth is, it is really odd to go from a house full of 4 children to a very quiet house with just the two of us. Carl does not make much noise!

I teach a new member's class at our church which was this past Sunday. I have everyone introduce themselves--which with 40+ people on most occasions can take a while--BUT I am a people person and I want to hear about them. So this one guy said that one of the reasons they loved our church was because of the children's ministry--and he added, "and we have a lot of children." I said, "How many do you have?" New member man replied, "We have 4." I said, "We have four and you are right it is a lot."

4 children are a lot!
A lot of:
hugs
goodnight kisses
goodmorning kisses
no reason at all kisses
shoes left laying around
giggles
loads of laundry
"I love you, Mommy"es
stories
"Can you help me with..."
activities after school
time lying on their beds talking about their day
running around in the car
making cookies
shopping (we love shopping!)
trips to Josh's Sno Shack
homework (we dislike homework!)
teaching about experiencing God in their EveryDay lives
"Mommy did you know..."
Bedtime stories
laughing in the car
laughing at Wipe-Out--Funniest Home Video--etc. (or just people in general who fall, trip etc!)
laughing at each other
flip flops (we love flip flops!)
wiping tears
nighttime prayers
morning prayers
keep them safe Lord prayers
give me patience prayers
saying, "of all the little girls/boys in all the world, I am so glad you are mine"
JOY

So as much fun as Carl and I are having this week going to dinner etc etc ETC! I must say I am ready to see ALOT of kids! "Children are a gift from the Lord." and that is the truth!!!

Clean Slate

We have just experienced one of the most phenomenal weekends at our church. We were involved in a Women's Ministry missions opportunity we call Clean Slate.

This was our very first one. And it was absolutely amazing! It was totally awesome to help Dee. But probably equally phenomenal was to literally see the Body of Christ operate in complete oneness. I was absolutely blown away. Really words can not describe it!

Dee is a single mom with triplet 9 year old girls. WOW! The girls are with their dad this summer and were not able to be there. We did an Extreme Home Make-Over/Clean Sweep/What Not to Wear all wrapped into one this weekend for Dee.

She lives in a 2 bedroom duplex. She and her daughters had been sleeping in the same room in a bunk bed--she and one of the triplets slept on the bottom that was a full bed and then the other two slept in the twin bed on top--for the past two years! She has shared a room with her girls for 2 years. Well you can guess what we chose to do--give her her own space--a little retreat. Dee is a giver. She works full time and also majorly volunteers at her girl's school and is very involved in their PTA.

We had an incredible team that has been working with her for the past month and then this weekend the Clean Slate took place! We had over 50 volunteers go in and transform her home. We really only completely redid the bedrooms and the garage but cleaned and organized the rest of the house.

Over the course of the weekend we discovered that Dee was behind on a few utility bills and did not have this months rent. We were able to go in and take care of those things for her as well and really give her a Clean Slate--even financially! The Lord provided for this in an unusual way. We also had a garage sale on Saturday morning in the rain and raised over $200 to help with the cost of her bills.

We began on Thursday night. Dee had already started cleaning out a few things so we were not able to get on camera the FULL starting point. Then we worked all day Friday along with Dee until 5 pm. We then sent her to the Renaissance for the night and gave her a gift card to Carabba's for dinner--which was so generously provided by the managers--who just happen to be members at BattleCreek! My sweet friend and co-worker Cindy put a hotel goodie basket together for her. Cindy also was the Project Manager for the entire weekend. Again there are no words to describe this incredible woman--who I am so blessed to have in my life!

The next day our "Family Friend" Liz Pray and myself took Dee to lunch at Panera after she had her hair done (highlights and all!!!) and then we took her shopping with her $200 gift card to Cato's. She had not been shopping in 10 years! We had so much fun as she tried on outfit after outfit. I really did feel like Stacy London! She went to a friend's house to change into one of her new outfits before the big reveal at her house at 4:30.

She pulled into the driveway with BattleCreek on either side clapping her on and with smiles from ear to ear. An amazing moment. This lady deserved to be applauded. Oh my goodness I am nearly overwhelmed right now thinking about that. I just have to stop and say what a wonderful picture I think that was of Hebrews 12:1 "Since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses...cheering us on" The Word of God being lived out!

So much more I could say but a picture is worth a thousand words. My sweet friend Ashley Campbell shared her incredible gift of photography with us for the weekend and captured it all for us. Take a look for yourself right here.

Once Again, You Can't Make This Stuff Up!

I know I know. It has been a while...please forgive. We have had basketball camp, cheer camp, youth camp and children's camp. And I truly have so much I could blog about--neat things God did at all of those, but for now I will just post on the last 36 hours of life at the Lopez home.



Crazy stuff happens to us...so we have just chosen to roll with the punches and say Hallelujah anyhow.



Thursday around noon, my sweet husband came to church to help me do something. My sister and brother in law drove in from KC to pick up 400 beverage tubs (another story for another day) and to bring my 17 year old nephew Ridge to spend the week with us. (YEA--Ridge Camp) In the process Carl MESSED his back up--to the point of when he went back to work around 1:30 all he could do was gather his things and get home. Fast forward to 4:00 when the kids and I get home. I walk in the door to see my husband CRAWLING across the floor from our guest bath to the living room in boxers with his pants in the other hand. I said, "Sweetie, what are you doing!" He said, "Can you get me some shorts." I said, "Carl Lopez, what is the matter!!!" He said, "Denise I can not walk, will you get me some shorts." So I run to get him some shorts. In the meantime while he is in route to the living room floor, he turns his head and says, "Hi guys." to our kids.



He is now lying in the living room floor flat on his back complete with shorts on. Which is where he stayed until 4:15 in the morning. Bless his heart---major pain---awful---made me sad.



Thursday evening--guitar lessons, gymnastics, and Clean Slate--all of which took place with Carl lying in the floor on his back. Needless to say I was at the grocery store (WAL-MART SUPERCENTER---love it!) checking out at midnight. You gotta shop when you can--know what I mean. So I ended the night---or started the morning--which ever way you prefer to look at it, by putting away groceries and packing our 8 year old for camp.



I got in bed at 1:15. At 4:15 Carl makes it into the bed---bless his heart. Ouch! He begins snoring, which to be honest normally annoys me (and I must say few things about Carl Lopez annoy me). HoweverI was thrilled because at least he was asleep and not in pain. Then I can not sleep because I kept thinking if I dare moved I might wake him up and sleep was not in my future--snore snore goes the husband. So I go into the living room and try to go back to sleep--lay there....tick...tock....tick...tock.



At 5:45 I awake to our dog barking. The dog run is alongside our house outside our bedroom window so I run to the backyard, so Jake would not wake Carl up. Abby is out of the pen. "Abby, what are you doing out." Had she answered me, I would be making part of this story up. I go to the pen. Gate still locked a piece of the fence at top knocked off. The crazy thing JUMPED the fence--what!!! And now Jake the brown not so puppy chocolate lab is going crazy because he is left home alone while Abby is living it up roaming the yard. Thus the barking!! No water. I am sure Abby was in survival mode to get something to drink. So I let them both out to get them water. I forgot that when I went outside I left the back door open soooo, Jake runs in the house BARKING like crazy. I finally get him back out only to find a 5 year old and an 8 year old walking out of their bedroom--and making their way to the couch (hey what a minute guys--that is where I was sleeping er laying awake for the past hour and a half.) Thankfully we have a sectional--all is well.



Finally get the dogs happy and lay back down. Managed to fall back asleep and wake up at 8:30 in time to head out to Clean Slate. Get back home by 9:45 to get Avery ready for camp. I called at 10:15 to get Carl an appointment with Dr. Pray (great name huh?--wonderful man). They said "Can you be here at 10:45?" As much pain as Carl was in we had to make it. Did I mention that there was a downpour going on outside? Ridge is going to get Avery to church and I am going to take Carl to the Dr. Pray.



Let me say, the Lord sent Ridge to be cab driver, manny (male nanny) cousin, babysitter etc. What would we have done without him.


I leave Carl at the Dr., get to church just in time to have my daughter's head implanted into my side because she didn't think I was going to make it before they left. Send Ridge back to get Carl. Kiss and love on Avery. Write her a your an amazing kiddo we love you we are proud of you etc etc note for her to read at camp. And send her on her way.



So meanwhile, my friend Meredith and I stand in the parking lot and talk for the next 30 minutes--we did take a 4 year old, 5 year old and a 6 year old to the bathroom in the church during this time. So we decide that Ridge (man of the hour) is going to take all the remaining cousins and remaining Himayas to see Wally. Austin rides with Meredith. I walk to my car--the battery is dead--or so I thought.



I go running across the parking lot to catch Meredith before she pulls out. She comes over to give me a jump--only to find that my battery is smoking and there is blueish purple white crazy looking corrosion on the battery. WHAT! So we could do nothing but call Carl. So Carl pulls up about 20 minutes later with his chauffeur Ridge and hobbles over to the car. The battery cable has been eaten away for some reason.

Ridge takes the kids to the movie--Meredith goes home--and Carl and I proceed to fix the car. We went to Advance Auto Parts and got the parts we needed--I parked in handicap just so you know. We went back to the car and as Carl was putting the cable on he dropped the bolt in the engine. For whatever reason it did not fall all the way through. I am jumping on the car shaking it, hoping the bolt would fall out---nope. So Carl said, "It would be faster for you to go back and get another one." So I did. I go back to the parking lot and Carl starts to put the cable on and it snaps!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT.!!! On the way, I say, "I wonder what in the world the Lord is trying to teach us?" Carl said, "Not to shop at Advance Auto Parts." We go back to Advance Auto Parts and Carl goes in and gets another cable. We go back to the car and wa-la he fixes it and he heads home and I head to Clean Slate.

So there you have it.

I have just returned home from Clean Slate and will blog about that later....phenomenal day in the life of our church.

Father Knows Best!

Happy Father's Day! I am blessed to have wonderful fathers in my life! My daddy (as my sisters and I call him) is the very best! The most humble--giving--man perhaps on earth for sure in America! I do not take it for granted that I have a daddy that loves my mom, loves his girls, and loves his Lord! Thankful thankful.

Then there is my precious little grandpa. I had the incredible privilege to grow up next door to my paternal grandparents and spent ALOT of time with them growing up. Realistically this will probably be my last Father's Day with my sweet grandpa. He is 88, on dialysis, and in poor health. I have great memories of this sweet godly man who was soooo much fun--so funny.

Then there is the love of my life--father extraordinaire--Carl Lopez!!!

He is not normal (in a good way!) and I tell him that all of the time. He is the greatest daddy to our children. Can't even begin to describe in words--the time--the sacrifices--the affection--the tenderness--the love he shows our children. Carl had a great example also to follow--Bill Lopez. His dad went to be with the Lord 6 years ago this past March. He was an incredible man that everyone loved! So it makes Father's Day a little sad for Carl but what joy to know that one day we will be together again!

And then last but absolute first in my life is my heavenly Father. Oh that He calls me His child--can't believe it--can't get over it--but am sooo thankful. Love--love--love this verse--"Think how much the Father loves us. He loves us so much that he lets us be called his children, as we truly are..." 1 John 3:1 (Contemporary English Version)

So whatever your father situation here on earth--know that there is a Father in heaven who loves you just the way you are--His child!!